Parenting with Grace: Raising Set-Apart Kids in a Distracted World

Summer is here, and with it comes a mix of joy, chaos, and opportunity. The slower pace, the later nights, and the endless “Can we go?” requests from our kids. It’s a season where we crave connection but often find ourselves in a tug-of-war between discipline and grace, freedom and boundaries, guidance and independence.

If you’re anything like me, you’ve had those moments where you wonder, Am I doing this right? Am I messing them up?

I remember feeling the weight of motherhood early on—believing that every decision, every mistake, every moment of frustration would shape my kids forever. I was exhausted trying to control every outcome, thinking if I could just parent “right,” they would turn out “right.”

Then my late husband, Wade, reminded me of a truth that changed everything:

“They’re already messed up. Our job is to lead them to Jesus.”

At first, I thought, Wait, what?! But Scripture reminds us that we are all born into sin and fall short of God’s glory (Romans 3:23, NIV). Our kids don’t come into the world as blank slates. They come in need of a Savior, just like us.

That truth changed my parenting approach. I stopped focusing on trying to raise perfect kids and instead focused on raising kids who know how to follow Jesus. And let me tell you—grace changes everything.

Parenting with a “Set-Apart” Mindset

The world is loud, and it’s telling our kids who they should be, what they should believe, and what success looks like.

But we know better.

God calls our kids to be set apart, not to conform. As Paul instructs, “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind” (Romans 12:2, NIV).

So how do we parent in a way that prepares them to stand strong in a world that’s constantly trying to shape them?

 Teach them to hear God’s voice. Not just our voice, but His. If we only parent with rules but don’t teach them to seek truth, they’ll struggle when they’re on their own. One of the best questions we started asking our kids when making decisions was: What does God’s Word say about this?

Give them space to wrestle with faith. Our job isn’t to make their choices for them—it’s to help them build the confidence to make wise choices on their own.

Parent with grace, not fear. We don’t have to control our kids—we need to equip them. When we parent from fear, we clamp down. When we parent from faith, we guide and release.

When You Feel Like You’re Failing

Let’s be honest. Some days we feel like we’re winning at parenting, and other days we’re hiding in the laundry room with coffee, just trying to get through.

Can I tell you something? God knew exactly what He was doing when He gave you your kids.

And just like our kids need grace, we do too.

 You’re not failing—you’re learning.

 You’re not ruining them—you’re raising them.

 You’re not in this alone—God is with you every step of the way.

One of the things that helped me breathe easier as a parent was discovering simple, practical strategies that made parenting less overwhelming. That’s why I put them all into Parent Hacks—Real-Life Strategies for Raising Teens with Confidence and Faith.

These aren’t just theories. They’re real-life, grace-filled ways to set boundaries, build trust, and keep connection strong—even when your teen is rolling their eyes at you.

The Ultimate Parenting Hack: PRAYER

At the end of the day, no book, program, or strategy will ever replace the power of prayer.

Pray over your kids daily. Call out their name before the Lord.

Pray for wisdom in your parenting. God will give it when you ask (James 1:5, NIV).

Pray that they hear God’s voice. Because if they learn to hear Him, they will know how to follow Him (John 10:27, NIV).

And most importantly—pray for yourself. You are not just a parent. You are a daughter of the King, and He is walking with you in this calling.

Keep Going, Mama

If no one has told you lately—you’re doing better than you think.

You are raising world-changers.

You are leading them well.

And God is using every moment—yes, even the hard ones—to shape both you and them.

So keep going. Keep leading. Keep parenting with grace.

And if you ever need a little extra encouragement, grab a cup of coffee, open up Parent Hacks, and know that you’re not alone in this journey.

Author Francine Ivey

Francine Ivey is the CEO of Consumed Coaching, an elite coaching company that empowers Christian leaders and entrepreneurs to transform their passions into thriving businesses without compromising their faith.

Francine is an author, speaker, and coach with a heart for helping others walk in their God-given purpose. Connect with her on social media or visit

consumedcoaching.com for more information.

Want More Grace-Filled Parenting Strategies?

Parent Hacks: Real-Life Strategies for Raising Teens with Confidence and Faith is available now on Amazon.